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TF2 Engineer update hints?

Edit #2:  Oops! It seems a slightly-different but much-more-legible version of this document was presented as part of the classless update! I’ve left my original guesses and ***** marks in-place, but note that certain sections (ex. Silas Mann) are new.

I decided to take a stab at deciphering the tiny text of the Zephreniah Mann & Sons Co. Quarterly Concern, which was posted on the Engineer Update page. (May edit if new material is made legible.)

I suspect it contains hints the same way the “Poopy-Joe” clippings contained later-announced weapons for the “War!” update.

We’ve already had the “Musket Gonne” shotgun announced, but what about some “capsules of toxiferous vapour” and “magikal remedies”?

Edit: With the release of the Engineer Update achievement icons and names, it seems pretty certain a guitar will make an appearance somehow, which reinforces section VII…

The Zephreniah Mann & Sons Co. Quarterly Concern

Compendium of Broadswords, Musket-gonnes, and Domesday weaponry for Immediate Sale

by Zephreniah & Silas Mann, proprietors.

A view of the Weekly E*** and C************, spec.

[I]. Artilary & Munitions whc. the Zephreniah Mann & Sons Co. C********** Projectiles & most profligate were the Musket-Gonne / Philosophy of Which******* were ob************ from Learne’d Men.

[II]. Virulent Poisons, whc. the Zephrenian Mann & Sons Co. Vial of Toxiferous Plague ** proper handling of *** T****** of Meph**** Vapours ** ** incidentally ****** ***** M******  ***-O** Capsules if the proof of **** **** ** *** ** *****.

[III]. Domestic Occurances A list of Casualities, Burials, Christenings, Weddings, & **********

[IV]. Philosophy from *** Cra******* to the Proper Circumstances of Long-Bows

[V]. Remarkable Advancements for Zephreniah Mann& Sons Co. Products ** ********

[VI] Physic. L**** L**** Magikal & Obscure, for the treatment of Maladies, O***** W**** & the f******* of ******* **** & **** *****

[VII] Poetry & Musics on the subject of Weaponry

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